Getting Old -- When Is It The Lamest Excuse Ever?

My darling, darling, crazy mom.

She's ... a mature adult now.  I WILL NOT say her age.  She may be .... mature, but she'd find a way to kick my sorry butt long-distance if I did.

But the funny thing. .... Ready for it?

She keeps saying, "Oh, now that we're old, your dad and I ... (fill in the blank)."

Some of the blanks are filled with:
"We're easily amused."
or
"We like to watch the birds in the birdbath."
or
"We eat pizza for dinner even if it's 4 p.m."
or
"Sometimes we think that dessert BEFORE dinner is a good thing."
or
"Your dad loses his reading glasses."
or
"I like to take a nap in the early afternoon."
or
"Your father just doesn't believe that rules apply to him."

And I keep saying OVER and OVER, "Mom?  Who are you KIDDING?  You've been doing all these things ALL ALONG.  Now you just have a convenient excuse."

She scoffs a bit, and pretends to be all old and cranky.

 It's totally a ruse.