I was driving home from work one evening, and I was trying to figure
out what to have for dinner. On Thursdays, I get home long after the
family has dinner, so I'm on my own. I typically have leftovers or an
omelet or something I KNOW they wouldn't eat.
This is what I like to call "Night Before I Have To Go Grocery Shopping" cooking.
Ingredients:
One sweet potato, preferably all dried out and a leeetle moldy in spots -- Peeled and then shredded
One cup of cauliflower (frozen, possibly from the Reagan
administration), microwaved with water until extremely soft (4 minutes?)
One egg
1/3 cup of peas -- leftover if possible
1/2 of a BRATWURST . Chop it as finely as is reasonably possible
A few TB of regular white flour
Sprinkle with:
a bunch of garlic powder (1 tb?)
a little less cumin (1/2 Tb?)
some paprika, because I have WAAAY too much paprika (you know how
sometimes you go shopping and each and every week you buy the SAME 5
pounds of sugar and it starts stacking up? That happened to me with
paprika)
A bunch of ground pepper (2 tsp, maybe)
some salt to taste
Mush it around a bit. If it sticks together in clumps, it's good. If
it's all wet and floppy, add more flour. If it's all dry and crumbly,
add some more egg or water or something.
In a littlish bowl, put about 1/2 cup of cornmeal (I used yellow, but you are your own person)
and about 1/2 cup of panko bread crumbs. I'd bet that crushed up crackers would work too, or just flour.
I added spices and things:
A lot more parsley (dried) than I planned (prob. 1/8 cup)
Salt
basil
I contemplated adding mustard seeds, but wasn't sure, so I drew the line.
Mush the veggie mix into balls (golfball-ish in size) and drop them into
the crumb mix. Mash them together and make them flattish.
[Kate's Note: I tried today BAKING these. TWICE as awesome, fewer calories.
Spray a cookie sheet w/Pam, place the fritters on the pan, spray the
FRITTERS with Pam, and bake for 12ish minutes at 375, flipping once when
the bottom browns.
ONLY 70ish calories per fritter!]
All this time, you've been heating the oil (I used boring veggie oil).
It's -- I guess -- shallow oil. I'd estimate that the fritters will be
up to their ankles or possibly knees in the oil. But no higher.
Drop them in (careful -- boiling oil is used to kill people in movies,
you know) and let them cook until nice and brown and delicious on BOTH
sides. You will have to flip them at some point. NOTE: Use a METAL
flipping thing, NOT plastic. Please believe me on this.
Drain them on paper towels.
Serve with BEER! Just kidding. Wine is fine too.
ALSO: consider making some sauce:
equalish parts of HORSERADISH and KETCHUP. You DO know that's what
"cocktail sauce," or "shrimp sauce" really is, right? It's totally
true.
If you can make 12 little fritters out of this, they come to about 80 calories each.
And? Totally, weirdly awesome.
Showing posts with label cooking. Show all posts
Showing posts with label cooking. Show all posts
Saturday, June 2, 2012
Wednesday, May 9, 2012
Journey From Sloth and Despair, Pollock Edition
Remember how I'm continually (well, on-and-off continually) striving to eat "cleaner" and more whole-foodishly?
Yup. Still doing it. BUT. Today's lunch was one of the best examples of how fresh food can be incredibly vibrant AND furkin' HEALTHY!
I have no pictures except for that of an empty plate. It was too good to stop and take pictures.
I'll write this in the order you'd need to, to serve this for yourself at lunch.
POLLOCK FILLET (about 100 grams, or a typical portion).
Thaw it in the nuker. Don't cook the hell out of it, just make it not frozen.
CAULIFLOWER: (about 1 cup when chopped)
Cut 1/4 of the head of a cauliflower off. Cut off most of the stemmy part. No need to go crazy,. It's going to get all blended up. Chop into teeny bits. SHOMPSHOMPSHOMP with your big knife.
[REMOVE POLLACK FILLET FROM MICROWAVE, then heat a small cast iron skillet or nonstick pan to medium]
Put CAULIFLOWER into a microwave safe bowl with a teeny sprinkling of water and microwave for a few minutes until soft. If it starts to brown, take it out. It's slightly overdone, but ah well.
Put fish into the pan. If you like, put in a bit of olive oil first. I didn't but that's just me. I don't care if it sticks.
CAULIFLOWER into a blender with a few TB of milk, some salt and pepper. Add other herbs if you want, or some horseradish (you could add cream or butter or cheese too, but I"m goin' healthy here). BLEND, blend, my friends, until all the lumps are gone. No, really. Like mashed potatoes.
When fish is nice and flaky (just like YOU! ha.), set aside.
Put on your plate about 1/4 cup of fresh pico de gallo (I get this from the produce section of our Kroger. It's chopped tomatoes, jalapenos, onions, and cilantro with a bit of lime juice and garlic). Then top THAT with 1/2 of a PINK GRAPEFRUIT, supremed (that's fancy-talk for "cut in half, and cut out the good stuff in chunks and leave the grody white stuff in there"). You may want to sprinkle the grapefruit with a teeny bit of sugar or Splenda-ish stuff.
Then put your fish on top of that. Squeeze out some of the juice from the grapefruit carcass onto the fish.
Spoon the cauliflowertatoes onto the plate next to your pile o' healthy yum, and taste to see if it needs more salt or whatnot. **NOTE, added later. Before you spoon the cauliflowertatoes, CHECK to see if they are still hot. Mine cooled off extremely quickly, and could have used a quick 30 seconds in the microwave.*
Seriously? Only about 235 calories, and that's if you USE 1 TSP OLIVE OIL.
I give it an A+ for flavor and health.
It's a 3 out of 5 on the "pain in the butt to make" scale (5 being lasagne with homemade noodles and fresh ricotta, 1 is scrambled eggs EDITED: 1 is a PopTart)
Yup. Still doing it. BUT. Today's lunch was one of the best examples of how fresh food can be incredibly vibrant AND furkin' HEALTHY!
I have no pictures except for that of an empty plate. It was too good to stop and take pictures.
I'll write this in the order you'd need to, to serve this for yourself at lunch.
POLLOCK FILLET (about 100 grams, or a typical portion).
Thaw it in the nuker. Don't cook the hell out of it, just make it not frozen.
CAULIFLOWER: (about 1 cup when chopped)
Cut 1/4 of the head of a cauliflower off. Cut off most of the stemmy part. No need to go crazy,. It's going to get all blended up. Chop into teeny bits. SHOMPSHOMPSHOMP with your big knife.
[REMOVE POLLACK FILLET FROM MICROWAVE, then heat a small cast iron skillet or nonstick pan to medium]
Put CAULIFLOWER into a microwave safe bowl with a teeny sprinkling of water and microwave for a few minutes until soft. If it starts to brown, take it out. It's slightly overdone, but ah well.
Put fish into the pan. If you like, put in a bit of olive oil first. I didn't but that's just me. I don't care if it sticks.
CAULIFLOWER into a blender with a few TB of milk, some salt and pepper. Add other herbs if you want, or some horseradish (you could add cream or butter or cheese too, but I"m goin' healthy here). BLEND, blend, my friends, until all the lumps are gone. No, really. Like mashed potatoes.
When fish is nice and flaky (just like YOU! ha.), set aside.
Put on your plate about 1/4 cup of fresh pico de gallo (I get this from the produce section of our Kroger. It's chopped tomatoes, jalapenos, onions, and cilantro with a bit of lime juice and garlic). Then top THAT with 1/2 of a PINK GRAPEFRUIT, supremed (that's fancy-talk for "cut in half, and cut out the good stuff in chunks and leave the grody white stuff in there"). You may want to sprinkle the grapefruit with a teeny bit of sugar or Splenda-ish stuff.
Then put your fish on top of that. Squeeze out some of the juice from the grapefruit carcass onto the fish.
Spoon the cauliflowertatoes onto the plate next to your pile o' healthy yum, and taste to see if it needs more salt or whatnot. **NOTE, added later. Before you spoon the cauliflowertatoes, CHECK to see if they are still hot. Mine cooled off extremely quickly, and could have used a quick 30 seconds in the microwave.*
Seriously? Only about 235 calories, and that's if you USE 1 TSP OLIVE OIL.
I give it an A+ for flavor and health.
It's a 3 out of 5 on the "pain in the butt to make" scale (5 being lasagne with homemade noodles and fresh ricotta,
Sunday, April 22, 2012
Journey From Sloth and Despair: The Seafood Edition
A few days ago, I went shopping all by myself. Bliss.
I decided that I was going to be brave and buy some things I've never tried. Some of which I've never even CONSIDERED trying. But if doing Indonesian cooking lessons has taught me anything, it's that the weird-looking stuff sometimes tastes awesome.
So.
I bought a can of salmon. Yes, I know. Not too adventurous. But, I'd never bought any before (canned) and I had just heard a thing on NPR about eating sustainable foods, and canned salmon is high on the list! So BAM, into the cart.
Then I bought kale. I have had kale before, but this time I was going to try to get the rest of the family to eat some. BAM. Into the cart.
My final excitement was swordfish! I do love fish, but never seem to get it since my family is not a fish family (that one was for you, Steven). PLOP. Into the cart.
Now that I"m home with all my sea-related bounty, what to do? Well, I decided to throw a 'seafood-tasting' dinner. Here's how it all went down:
Reheated mashed potatoes from yesterday's dinner. CHECK.
Shrimp:
Small shrimp, thawed in cold water, then dunked in egg, and then dropped into cornmeal that had about a teaspoon of "grill seasoning" added into it. Fried them in shallow oil.
Salmon:
Took the canned salmon and drained it (like canned tuna), mixed it with crushed Saltines, some dried dill, and some finely chopped parsley (plus salt and pepper). Formed into little patties, dunked in the egg, then into the cornmeal. Fried in shallow oil.
Swordfish:
Took the piece (only .6 of a pound) of swordfish and coated it in some Teriyaki marinade. Heated some oil in a small pan until very hot, and seared each side for a few minutes. Then put it on an oiled baking sheet and finished in the oven while I finished making the salmon cakes.
Kale:
I like kale chips but hadn't foisted them on the family before. I washed the kale in the sink, ripping into pieces and removing the tough stems. Put kale onto a kitchen towel and mostly dried it. Divided it onto two baking sheets. Poured a bit of olive oil over the leaves and tossed. In the first sheet, I sprinkled the kale with garlic powder, cumin, and some kosher salt (too much salt, as it turned out).
The other kale got about 1-2 tsp. of sugar and some cinnamon. (I know! I was experimenting).
Baked them at about 450F for a few minutes, tossed the leaves about a bit, and added a few more minutes.
Served all with whole tiny bell peppers (raw), some homemade shrimp cocktail sauce (horseradish and ketchup).
Results:
Kids liked the salmon cakes! WoW! So did I.
Everybody liked the shrimp.
Daughter liked the kale, son tolerated it. (Cinnamon ones were surprisingly good)
Potatoes went over fine.
All liked the Swordfish. Actually, I prefer tuna steaks, but this was fine.
All liked the teeny bell peppers.
I was the only one who tried the spicy sauce.
Now I know that I can safely make shrimp or salmon to rave reviews, and I can serve swordfish as long as there's something else to fill them up, since they were more lukewarm on that. And hopefully, son will come around to liking kale chips as much as daughter. Bell peppers will now go into lunchboxes!
I give today a B+.
I decided that I was going to be brave and buy some things I've never tried. Some of which I've never even CONSIDERED trying. But if doing Indonesian cooking lessons has taught me anything, it's that the weird-looking stuff sometimes tastes awesome.
So.
I bought a can of salmon. Yes, I know. Not too adventurous. But, I'd never bought any before (canned) and I had just heard a thing on NPR about eating sustainable foods, and canned salmon is high on the list! So BAM, into the cart.
Then I bought kale. I have had kale before, but this time I was going to try to get the rest of the family to eat some. BAM. Into the cart.
My final excitement was swordfish! I do love fish, but never seem to get it since my family is not a fish family (that one was for you, Steven). PLOP. Into the cart.
Now that I"m home with all my sea-related bounty, what to do? Well, I decided to throw a 'seafood-tasting' dinner. Here's how it all went down:
Reheated mashed potatoes from yesterday's dinner. CHECK.
Shrimp:
Small shrimp, thawed in cold water, then dunked in egg, and then dropped into cornmeal that had about a teaspoon of "grill seasoning" added into it. Fried them in shallow oil.
Salmon:
Took the canned salmon and drained it (like canned tuna), mixed it with crushed Saltines, some dried dill, and some finely chopped parsley (plus salt and pepper). Formed into little patties, dunked in the egg, then into the cornmeal. Fried in shallow oil.
Swordfish:
Took the piece (only .6 of a pound) of swordfish and coated it in some Teriyaki marinade. Heated some oil in a small pan until very hot, and seared each side for a few minutes. Then put it on an oiled baking sheet and finished in the oven while I finished making the salmon cakes.
Kale:
I like kale chips but hadn't foisted them on the family before. I washed the kale in the sink, ripping into pieces and removing the tough stems. Put kale onto a kitchen towel and mostly dried it. Divided it onto two baking sheets. Poured a bit of olive oil over the leaves and tossed. In the first sheet, I sprinkled the kale with garlic powder, cumin, and some kosher salt (too much salt, as it turned out).
The other kale got about 1-2 tsp. of sugar and some cinnamon. (I know! I was experimenting).
Baked them at about 450F for a few minutes, tossed the leaves about a bit, and added a few more minutes.
Served all with whole tiny bell peppers (raw), some homemade shrimp cocktail sauce (horseradish and ketchup).
Results:
Kids liked the salmon cakes! WoW! So did I.
Everybody liked the shrimp.
Daughter liked the kale, son tolerated it. (Cinnamon ones were surprisingly good)
Potatoes went over fine.
All liked the Swordfish. Actually, I prefer tuna steaks, but this was fine.
All liked the teeny bell peppers.
I was the only one who tried the spicy sauce.
Now I know that I can safely make shrimp or salmon to rave reviews, and I can serve swordfish as long as there's something else to fill them up, since they were more lukewarm on that. And hopefully, son will come around to liking kale chips as much as daughter. Bell peppers will now go into lunchboxes!
I give today a B+.
Tuesday, March 6, 2012
Allie & Friend's Kitchen: A Loose Transcript
Right this minute, my 11 y.o. daughter and her 10 y.o. across-the-street best friend are trying to make cupcakes or muffins or something. I can hear them from the next room, but can't see them. BTW: I have NO idea how any of this relates to VAMPIRES. No idea.
Overheard:
BFF: How are we going to do this? Can we just make it up?
A: Well, yeah. But...
BFF: Maybe we can use a recipe?
A: But that's boring.
BFF: Well, we could just ... let it guide us.
A: YEAH! WE can add stuff!
---
BFF: Let's divide it up. It says "wet" and "dry" ingredients are separate. You be wet, I'll be dry.
---
BFF: Ok. Um. How much flour?
A: 2 cups?
BFF: You sure?
A. Uh. Let me check. OH. 2 and a half.
BFF: Is that 'two AND a half' or 'two halves'?
A: I think two and a half. It says .... "two, one slash two." That's two and a half.
BFF: OK
--
BFF: Now it says "baking powder." What's that?
A: It's up there. The round one ... no. Not that one. The next one. Right there... yup.
BFF: How much?
A: I think.... um. A tablespoon.
BFF? Tablespoon?
A: The big one.
BFF: You sure? Or is that 'teaspoon'?
A: "T B is tablespoon. T S P is teaspoon."
BFF: ohhh
---
A: Ok. Butter.
BFF: How much?
A: It says a half stick. How much is that?
BFF? Well, a half of a stick.
A: But our butter comes in a round thing.
BFF: Hm. Let's see. OH! It says "4 TB" also.
A: Oh. Ok. Then four tablespoons.
BFF: Just dump it in? OK
A: WAIIIIIT! It's supposed to be melted!
BFF: Whoops. (clinking sound heard) There. Took it back out.
(microwave beeping)
A: Careful. You never touch the bowl when you've heated something like butter. It's really hot.
BFF: Ok. (drawer opening heard) Can I use this?
A: Yes.
---
(Beeping of oven temperature being set)
-----
A: LET'S ADD OUR STUFF TOGETHER!
BFF: YAAAAY!
(much clanging of spoon on bowl heard)
A: GO GO GO GO GO!
BFF: Stir hard to get ALL the lumps out!
(clangclang)
-----
A: what do you wanna add?
BFF: chocolate?
A: YEAH! And maybe ... strawberries?
BFF. Oooh. yeah.
---
BFF: I wanna use the big, BIG spoon.
A. Here.
---
A: I, like, got this pan for CHRISTMAS. It has an anti-stick thing on it so if you spill stuff on it, it just slides off. It's so awesome.
BFF: (giggles)
---
BFF: (giggle) Allie! You're squeezing the strawberries. Eeewwww. Let ME do it now.
A: HA! Oh no! Teddy (the dog) is eating something! NO, TEDDY! Oh dear. He's eating the butter wrapper.
---
BFF: Ok. I need to wash my hands now to make mine.
A: Ok. Good idea.
BFF: I'm going to add strawberries ON TOP. To make them attractive.
A: Oh, they're SO ADORABLE!
---
BFF: (clanging of spoon) Oh. That is SO chocolatey and gooood.
A: Mine don't taste too strawberryish now, but I think they will once they're cooked.
BFF: Oooh! They're nice! I can taste the cinnamon.
---
A: Oops. OhhhH!
BFF: How much did you ADD just now? DON"T STIR IT IN? DON'T!
A: Well.... too late.
BFF: HAHAAAA! Oh, that is PINK! Get your mom to see. HA!
---
(concentrated quiet, with the occasional clang of a spoon on bowl, and the crunching of muffin papers being rearranged)
---
(Beeping of the oven timer being set)
---
BFF: I'm going to do the strawberry ones now.
A: I'll do the chocolate.
BFF: Ok.
---
BFF: We should probably do the dishes.
A: Mmmmmmph.
---
BFF: I only did one major one. I mean, one that's completely full. I wonder how it'll turn out -- probably splat out all over the place.
A: mmHmmm
---
A: I have an idea! We'll each use a big big big big pan and use the rest of the batter.
BFF: What kind of pan? Can we use cooking spray? Do you have spray?
A: MOM! WHERE'S THE COOKING SPRAY?
---
(spraying sounds heard)
---
(giggling and clanking)
----
BFF: Here, put some of THESE over there. What did YOU DO, Allie? ALLIE.
A: Ooops.
BFF: Oh, Allie.
---
(many more short sprays heard)
---
A: C'mon batter! Go faster! (tapping sounds heard)
BFF: Maybe we could just.... (clanging sounds) Hmmm.
A: Oh, LOOK!
BFF: Both of 'em?
A: Yes.
---
(Oven door opening, cautious sliding sounds heard. Beeping of timer being started)
---
And then? CLEANING sounds begin. Rumbling of chairs being dragged around, cabinet doors opening and banging closed.
---
BFF: When these are done? You can like, put them on a special tray, but don't put them there yet. Vampires. You know?
A: Mmmmhmmm.
----
A: WHOA! Look at YOURS!
BFF: WHOA! Look at YOURS! Look at YOUR Neapolitan one!
A: LOOK at YOUR Neapolitan one!
---
BFF: ALLIE! 50 seconds left!
A: OH! OK!
Together: 10! 9! 8! (giggles) 7! 6! 5! 4! 3! 2! 1!
Post Script:
Muffins were good. A trifle tough, but quite good. And there were two very proud little girls who made a nice memory of an afternoon off of school. But I'm still wondering about the vampires.
Overheard:
BFF: How are we going to do this? Can we just make it up?
A: Well, yeah. But...
BFF: Maybe we can use a recipe?
A: But that's boring.
BFF: Well, we could just ... let it guide us.
A: YEAH! WE can add stuff!
---
BFF: Let's divide it up. It says "wet" and "dry" ingredients are separate. You be wet, I'll be dry.
---
BFF: Ok. Um. How much flour?
A: 2 cups?
BFF: You sure?
A. Uh. Let me check. OH. 2 and a half.
BFF: Is that 'two AND a half' or 'two halves'?
A: I think two and a half. It says .... "two, one slash two." That's two and a half.
BFF: OK
--
BFF: Now it says "baking powder." What's that?
A: It's up there. The round one ... no. Not that one. The next one. Right there... yup.
BFF: How much?
A: I think.... um. A tablespoon.
BFF? Tablespoon?
A: The big one.
BFF: You sure? Or is that 'teaspoon'?
A: "T B is tablespoon. T S P is teaspoon."
BFF: ohhh
---
A: Ok. Butter.
BFF: How much?
A: It says a half stick. How much is that?
BFF? Well, a half of a stick.
A: But our butter comes in a round thing.
BFF: Hm. Let's see. OH! It says "4 TB" also.
A: Oh. Ok. Then four tablespoons.
BFF: Just dump it in? OK
A: WAIIIIIT! It's supposed to be melted!
BFF: Whoops. (clinking sound heard) There. Took it back out.
(microwave beeping)
A: Careful. You never touch the bowl when you've heated something like butter. It's really hot.
BFF: Ok. (drawer opening heard) Can I use this?
A: Yes.
---
(Beeping of oven temperature being set)
-----
A: LET'S ADD OUR STUFF TOGETHER!
BFF: YAAAAY!
(much clanging of spoon on bowl heard)
A: GO GO GO GO GO!
BFF: Stir hard to get ALL the lumps out!
(clangclang)
-----
A: what do you wanna add?
BFF: chocolate?
A: YEAH! And maybe ... strawberries?
BFF. Oooh. yeah.
---
BFF: I wanna use the big, BIG spoon.
A. Here.
---
A: I, like, got this pan for CHRISTMAS. It has an anti-stick thing on it so if you spill stuff on it, it just slides off. It's so awesome.
BFF: (giggles)
---
BFF: (giggle) Allie! You're squeezing the strawberries. Eeewwww. Let ME do it now.
A: HA! Oh no! Teddy (the dog) is eating something! NO, TEDDY! Oh dear. He's eating the butter wrapper.
---
BFF: Ok. I need to wash my hands now to make mine.
A: Ok. Good idea.
BFF: I'm going to add strawberries ON TOP. To make them attractive.
A: Oh, they're SO ADORABLE!
---
BFF: (clanging of spoon) Oh. That is SO chocolatey and gooood.
A: Mine don't taste too strawberryish now, but I think they will once they're cooked.
BFF: Oooh! They're nice! I can taste the cinnamon.
---
A: Oops. OhhhH!
BFF: How much did you ADD just now? DON"T STIR IT IN? DON'T!
A: Well.... too late.
BFF: HAHAAAA! Oh, that is PINK! Get your mom to see. HA!
---
(concentrated quiet, with the occasional clang of a spoon on bowl, and the crunching of muffin papers being rearranged)
---
(Beeping of the oven timer being set)
---
BFF: I'm going to do the strawberry ones now.
A: I'll do the chocolate.
BFF: Ok.
---
BFF: We should probably do the dishes.
A: Mmmmmmph.
---
BFF: I only did one major one. I mean, one that's completely full. I wonder how it'll turn out -- probably splat out all over the place.
A: mmHmmm
---
A: I have an idea! We'll each use a big big big big pan and use the rest of the batter.
BFF: What kind of pan? Can we use cooking spray? Do you have spray?
A: MOM! WHERE'S THE COOKING SPRAY?
---
(spraying sounds heard)
---
(giggling and clanking)
----
BFF: Here, put some of THESE over there. What did YOU DO, Allie? ALLIE.
A: Ooops.
BFF: Oh, Allie.
---
(many more short sprays heard)
---
A: C'mon batter! Go faster! (tapping sounds heard)
BFF: Maybe we could just.... (clanging sounds) Hmmm.
A: Oh, LOOK!
BFF: Both of 'em?
A: Yes.
---
(Oven door opening, cautious sliding sounds heard. Beeping of timer being started)
---
And then? CLEANING sounds begin. Rumbling of chairs being dragged around, cabinet doors opening and banging closed.
---
BFF: When these are done? You can like, put them on a special tray, but don't put them there yet. Vampires. You know?
A: Mmmmhmmm.
----
A: WHOA! Look at YOURS!
BFF: WHOA! Look at YOURS! Look at YOUR Neapolitan one!
A: LOOK at YOUR Neapolitan one!
---
BFF: ALLIE! 50 seconds left!
A: OH! OK!
Together: 10! 9! 8! (giggles) 7! 6! 5! 4! 3! 2! 1!
Post Script:
Muffins were good. A trifle tough, but quite good. And there were two very proud little girls who made a nice memory of an afternoon off of school. But I'm still wondering about the vampires.
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
Making A Turkey Dinner (many, many photos)
Last week, I had some time off from my (very taxing*) job, and decided to use that time to make my family A Nice Dinner. The kind with a meat, some veggies, and a dessert! All in a row, and on purpose.
[*my job is awesome]
I chose this menu:
Turkey Breast with Stuffing
Mashed Potatoes and Gravy
Green Beans with toasted Almonds (why am I randomly Capitalizing? I don't Know.)
Cranberry Jelly
Pumpkin Pie with CoolWhip (do NOT knock CoolWhip)
I started with an eight-pound TURKEY BREAST. It was frozen, so the day before, I plopped it in the fridge ON A PLATE to thaw. It started as hard as a turkeybreast-shaped rock.
 |
| Please imagine this right-side-up. My photo editing mojo has temporarily escaped me. |
 | |
| LOOK INSIDE! A PRESENT! | It's like a poultry version of CrackerJacks. |
It was my very FAVORITE part of making turkey. The bag o' giblets. OR SO I THOUGHT. I obediently slid the plastic (hmmm. Usually paper.) bag of stuff from the opening of the turkey. "Hm," thought I. "Feels lumpy. Must be the giblets! I'll just let it set here in the sink and thaw a bit more. Then I'll rinse the bits inside of it and see what I've got to work with."
 |
| I rinsed and then patted the turkey dry. USING PAPER TOWELS, people. |
 |
| Upon further inspection, the bag said to "put contents of package into small sauce pan and heat over medium..." and so on. So I thought, "hey, I'll rinse the giblets." |
 | |
| Only to find NOTHING BUT ICE. It was frozen pre-made Gravy Substitute. Ick. |
 |
| Into the trash bag it went. |
 |
| I bought this GORGEOUS bread on superduper sale a few months ago, and froze it. |
 |
| Tore it up into smallish pieces, sprayed with some baking spray, then sprinkled with "Poultry Seasoning" (ground rosemary, sage, thyme) and garlic. Tossed into the oven (350F) until crunchy, maybe 10 minutes (I stirred them around occasionally) |
 | |
| This is ONE celery rib, ONE big carrot, half of an onion and HALF CUP of fresh (frozen) cranberries. All cut up tiny, and with 3 TB of butter. |
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| Roasted them in the pre-heating oven (maybe 350F) for a bit, then stirred them. Put them back in. |
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| They got nice and softish. |
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| Added the toasty bread to the veggies. |
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| Mooshed them about a bit. Note to self. They are HOT. |
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| A bit dry, so I added some chicken broth. Maybe a cup. Didn't want soupy, just damp. |
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| Smooshed it all kind of flat so it would evenly absorb the broth. Tossed the whole thing back in the 350F oven for maybe 10 more minutes. GETTING THE STUFFING HOT makes it safer to stuff poultry, AND helps the cooking be more even. |
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| BURRRRRRP. 'Scuse me. JUST KIDDING. I pulled the skin up and stuck pieces of butter AND some fresh-ish herbs between skin and meat. I also rubbed the OUTSIDE with butter and herbs. Schmancy, no? |
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| Do yourself a favor and CUT THE CHUNK OF BUTTER BEFORE you start playing around with the raw bird. I wash my hands like a fiend when cooking poultry, but I'd rather not take a chance with contaminating the rest of the butter. |
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| These are fresh-ish herbs (rosemary, thyme, oregano). I have a little herb garden near my back door. I forgot to cut them down before winter, so they are just sitting there under the snow. I went out (barefoot, thankyouverymuch) in the snow and ripped off a handful of whatever was closest. They were dry, but still awesome. |
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| STUFF. I didn't really stuff it all firm, but I did pat it so it wouldn't all fall out. Don't to forget to stuff the other (neck) end. Also? When you pull a pan of stuffing from a 350F oven, IT'S HOT. Duh. You'd really think I'd remember that. |
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| "I"m ready for my close-up, Mr. DeMille." |
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| This is the plastic bag I always keep in the sink when I prepare poultry. ALL of the wrappers and paper towels and such go in there. It minimizes contamination. When I'm done, I tie it up and then wrap it in another plastic bag and toss it. Then I wash my hands AGAIN. |
OK: The turkey is tucked safely in the 350F oven. I shoved some more herbs in around it (on the bottom of the pan) because, basically, I hated to waste what I went out IN BARE FEET IN THE SNOW for. The oven rack was low, probably the bottom third of the oven.
Bake for (in this case) about 3 hours, or until the temperature of the breast meat is about 155F.
Bake for (in this case) about 3 hours, or until the temperature of the breast meat is about 155F.
Now it's time for PIE!
I used the recipe from Joy Of Cooking. Love that book.
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| Most, but not all of the ingredients. Pumpkin puree, evaporated milk, butter, shortening. ALSO used: vinegar, water, flour, sugar, salt, eggs. Spices. I may still be missing something. |
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| This is 1/2 cup of shortening and 1/2 cup of butter. I cut the butter up a bit, and tossed the whole bowl into the freezer, since my shortening lives in the cabinet over the stove, and it was a trifle melty. |
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| See? I remembered the salt. |
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| Took it out of the freezer and added the 2 cups flour, 1 tsp. sugar, and 1 tsp. salt. |
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| I used the pastry blender thingy to cut it all up into the flour. Now and then I'd toss it all (like you're being fancy when sauteeing something and want to flip it without using a spoon). |
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| Obviously, that went well. Sigh. |
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| They say to cut it together until it looks like crumbs. I really think it looks more like cottage cheese. |
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| This is the magic ingredient. Vinegar. I add about 1-2 teaspoons of vinegar to a cup with some ice. Then I top it with 2 tablespoons of water. |
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| Then I pour it over the crumbly flour mixture. After that, I toss the dough about a bit to distribute the water, but I don't stir it. |
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| I mush it down with my hand (that I just rinsed with COLD water, so I don't heat things up). This makes sure that it's all reasonably well moistened. |
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| And DUMP onto the counter. I am VERY bad at making crusts pretty, and I suspect that my technique stinks. So don't necessarily do as I do. I know. I inspire such confidence. |
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| I fold it a couple times and then stick it into a plastic bag. |
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| This bag will go into the fridge for just as long as it takes me to make the filling. So maybe 5 minutes, tops. |
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| 2 eggs (YES, Steven, that's Grandma's stirring fork. HA! I win.) |
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| Now, you could dig out your spices like this, or... |
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| You could take the cheater's way out. I have this because it's awesome on a pumpkin spice latte. But I tried it in the pie this time! |
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| A little salt.... |
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| 2 teaspoons or so spice |
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| a bunch of sugar (about 1/3 cup) |
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| Evaporated milk. NOT condensed milk. DO NOT make that mistake. Gag. |
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| Pumpkin puree. OR you could eviscerate your very own pumpkin, seed it, peel it, steam it, cool it, mash it, and then strain it. Or. You could open the can. |
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| Taste test it. I KNOW it has raw eggs in it. This tasted lovely, BTW. But you need to know how your spices are. |
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| Here's my fairly ugly pie crust. I sort of rolled it out, and sort of pressed it in with my fingers. |
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| NOW: separate an egg and set aside the white. Mix up the yolk. |
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| Dump the yolk into your UNBAKED pie crust and schmear it around so it covers all the inner surfaces. This will keep the pie filling from making the crust all soggy and nasty. |
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| Be-yolked crust. |
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| I FORGOT TO TAKE A PICTURE! BAKE THE CRUST! PREBAKE it for maybe 10 minutes. REALLYREALLY. Don't forget.THEN add the lovely filling. |
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| Fill 'er up! |
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| The filling should go almost to the top, not quite. |
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| BAKE at 425F for 15 minutes, then lower heat to 350F for 40-50 more minutes. Take out when it's not jiggly and a knife inserted in the center comes out with only a LITTLE of the pumpkin clinging to it. |
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| Whole almonds. Take your green stone mortar (or pestle? whichever) and whack each one to break it roughly. Plop them into a smallish pan with NO OIL or anything. Dry-pan toasting is great for almonds. |
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| Stir those puppies around while you let them toast on medium heat. It will seem like nothing is happening for a good long while (5 minutes or so) and then all of a sudden, BAM. They'll toast. Then they'll burn right the hell up. So the minute they start to brown, take them off the heat. When they're toasty enough for you, POUR THEM OUT OF THE PAN onto a plate or a paper towel or something, because if you don't they'll be bitter, blackened shadows of their former nutty selves. Toss the almonds JUST before serving with fresh, steamed green beans. I use one handful for each person. |
What you see here is the roasting pan and its globs of deliciousness (drippings and some stuck-on stuffing and herbs).
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Took the turkey breast out and put it back onto our CLEAN cutting board. Covered it with foil for now.
I sprinkled the whole pan (with drippings and some stuffing) with Wondra flour (designed to not lump). Cooked it right in the pan on medium low heat while stirring. Just until I smelled the flour cooking. Then I added a bunch of milk (1.5 cups, maybe?) along with some chicken base (like bouillon, but better). Stir stirstir. |
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| Stirstir. |
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| Added some more milk. |
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| "What day is it? It's CHRISTMAS DAY, SIR!" (or just Tuesday) |
This was a rather labor-intensive meal for a weekday, but I had some time. It was a HUGE hit with the family, and provided lots of leftovers.
Hurray for turkey!
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